Love is...

You are so challenged to say u love me and i know that u do. But it is so hard to say “Shida, I love you” and i dont doubt that you do. But u cNt say it. And it pains u to say it. Your actions R loud and ur touches are so felt Nd you’re so scared and  that is not my issue. And then it is. Because you are so scared. Cue india Arie I am Ready to Love.

and cue- your exit
cue- you walking away from the spotlight
"You putting me on a spot"

and so I'll stay home for the first weekend in a month and I won't crowd you with my presence or my love

and you're? I don't even know
 I know you lovish me
I know you want me to born your child(ren)
I know youre planning your life with me
I know your'er paying for me
I know you're missing me
I know youre satisfied with me
I know you want to be with me
I know youre- actually I don't know what else to add

and so, Im home not wrapped in your arms and missing you so much
and I know the all I want to do and be is with you
I smelt ou today
but you weren't there
 I know I keep talking about you

and you have no one to talk about
about us
to
its just you, you, sometimes me, but just you
why don't you have friends
I have so many
you have Juan, one, Juan , one lol

And you know what?
I lied when I said I didn't want to marry you
I do
I want the paper
I want you
I want it all
to tie us together forever
but not with an audience
just you boo
just us
you and I

but I don't want to marry u into my debt or my shit
thats why I don't want to marry you
but I want you forever
faeva eva, eva eva
you and I.
my Aries and I

Im gonna (trying to) be patient because after all these years, a few months isn't a long time t wait for you to love me willingly and freely.
its just a blink in this lifetime that I have to wait for you to
initiate "I love you, Rashida"

Time.