Try Me

Battery on her phone has drained just like her personal energy. She appreciates those quiet nights.
 She talks inherently to the universe just so someone can hear her. She’s dying. Yelling. So someone can hear her. She decides to stop.

She picked up her common sense and knew all she had, was to pick up and continue forward: not by defeat, not through resilience, nor perseverance, not even pride.

She moves forward, continues, fights, perservers because she can never be stagnant. She couldn't ever do nothing. She insists for them to  "Come see bout me."

*I wrote this as a reminder that I do get lost, and conflicted, to the point that I do (have) forgotten the reason (strength of womanhood) behind it. I write as a single woman with children . I  also write as a daughter,  and a sister. A friend and a companion. Most importantly, I write as a woman- a single black mother.

I am often conflicted about everything. Am I goin to offend someone. well, fuckin sorry if you're that fuckin easily hurt. I'm built with a strong armor, because to be weak, would mean to be defeated and broken and hurt.. Nope, not me, said I, Rashida. Nah. Hell Nah! Not Eva!

Tired, these passive ass women, claiming victimization, through words. Yes, they're fuckin wrong. yes they should be punched in the face for saying outta pocket ass shit...ANNNND be HED FUCKIN RESPONSIBLE FOR THE DAMAGE THEY DO!  HOWEVER, I also feel, some of these home who have had to endure being spoken to in a certain manner are BITCHES. YEAH, I SAID IT. BITCHES. Most are white women vicitimizing themselves against the very men they seek out.

I know this second hand. I call these women Carolyn Donham. I call white fragility on them.  I say fuck yo tears, BITCH. I say victimization aint ever really been in your cards. You were fuckin our black men and having our back women nurse maid your babies, clothe and care for them in ways you chose not to. These care taking slaves could not read, but taught your children to. We were your strength through your weakness.

Oh, fragile, with woman, Im sorry you weren't better taken care of. Im sorry your have to think of your misfortunes and cry, cry for your future generation of children

Yeah, fuck you.fuck your tears. fuck your comfort. fuck your discomfort .  fuck you